I go back and forth between two ideas, as I do with many other topics in my life. I tend to see things in black and white, and while it is something I am working on and struggling with, I sometimes need my friends and family to remind me of it.
But this particular black and white struggle is fascinating, and I’m still working on the grey area. The white: In Judaism, the union between a man and a woman* is much more than marriage, it actually imitates the relationship between a person and G-d. Marriage in Judaism is a way to actually strengthen your connection with G-d if you’re into that sort of thing (which if you haven’t guessed by now, I am). Further, I believe so strongly in raising Jewish children that it would almost seem hypocritical for me to not get married and have kids.
Here’s where the black comes in: I don’t see myself getting married. Aside from the Jewish aspect of marriage, I strongly believe that marriage is a social construct. (See, my Tufts degree isn’t totally worthless, Mom.) I have never had an interest in long-term monogamous relationships for a slew of reasons from which I’ll spare you.
For the most part, I am content being single. I have amazing friends and a supportive family and I’ve been lucky enough (BH) to have realized the correct career path for myself (I bet you can’t guess what it is).
I don’t think of myself as “alone” so much as independent. I’m not ready for a romantic relationship with another person right now. I already have my perfect partner—Judaism. To me, Judaism isn’t so much a religion as it is a lifestyle, a value-system, a relationship with G-d, and a means to have a fulfilling life.
*or in my eyes a man and a man or a woman and a woman or whatever gender you identify with, I don’t believe in the binary gender system—there’s that Tufts degree again—but that is a topic for another day.
If you liked this, it's just the beginning! Upcoming posts will delve into practical Kashrut, easily incorporating prayer into your life, lessons learned from living in Israel, surprisingly Jewish TV shows, and more.